18. Endless Power

You can Love Me, You can Hate Me.  I personally think Indifference, the feeling of not feeling any thing at all, is the worst way you can insult and hurt a person.  I prefer to be loved but I can assure you we ALL have at least one thing in common with everyone in the world, the universal language of Music.

Music is You when Your not there.  My Comfort, my Best friend, my Therapist, my Motivator, my Arousal, my Emotion, My Experience, My Life, Your Life.  It's my heart beat. 

I download all my music thru Frost Wire, http://www.lomaximoproductions.com/home.php ( great website to download all mp3's of the latest of everything.  Free, Free, Free!

I follow one of my Favorite Talented NY DJ's of all Time-- DJ CHINO.  I've gone to his parties for the past 10 ten years and I am guaranteed a great time. http://www.djchino1.com/  His passion for music transcends thru his work and it just keeps you wanting More.  He has a unique skill on the turntables with amazing diversity with his mixes.  I usually download his music from www.soundcloud.com. 

My Recently Top Ten Downloaded this week

• Take it Down Low - Akon Ft Chris Brown
• Ven Conmigo - Daddy Yankee
• I'm On One - Drake Ft Rick Ross
• Ella Ella - Don Omar
• I'm into You - Jennifer Lopez ft Lil Wayne
• The Edge of Glory - Lady Gaga
• Party Rock Anthem - LMFAO
• Hello - Martin Solveig
• Mr Saxo Beat - Omega
• Motivation - Kelly Rowland

Music an Endless Power that Unites Us All!!!

17. Anorexic Wallet

I can be Fancy, you can be Fancy, Drake can be Fancy but Water MAY NOT be Fancy until now at least.  Water has more different trends than my own personal Style: Spring, Distilled, Purified, Mineral, Sparkling and Reverse Osmosis.

I am now bringing sexy back to TAP Water.  Water Bobble !! http://www.waterbobble.com/

Before Bobble I was a complete water snob.  If I can control the circumstances I only like the taste of Poland Spring and most Spring waters.  I detest Dasani, despise Avion and loathe Fuji.

Bobble actually gives tap water a good taste, doesn't de-mineralize it and removes all toxins.

The replacement filter comes in all different Fashionable colors, it last two months or 300 uses (that's 3.3 cents a serving) and it's only $6.95.


My only peeve on the bottle is the sucking sound it creates when you drink from it from the air being pulled back.  Other than that my mind is at ease knowing I am Living Right and Spending Right!!  Doing the environment good by eliminating plastic waste and my anorexic wallet can still starve because I am not spending anymore on bottled water.

16. Beyond Therapy

A High Knee Walker, a term my best friend, Denise and I made up to describe our unique style of running.  No matter how hard & fast we paced ourselves it seems like we were continuously running in place.  I’ve spent a whole year running and its simply pathetic how I was never able to improve my average mile of 10 min 30 sec.   Simply amazing how I did keep up my endurance & control to finish a Half Marathon in 2 hours and a half.

The beginning as a high knee walker started in mid 2008.  I was working out to one of those get off the Couch and Move It programs to train for a 5 mile race in Central Park.  My training hit a dead end rather quickly when I became aware of an unexpected health issue and went thru a small surgical procedure to remove some pre-cancer cells in my cervix. 

Denise, my right hand lady, one of the strongest, empowering, inspirational friends in my life decided to run that race in my place with absolutely no prior training in running.  Amazing!  We found out that my surgery was a success, Dee proudly finished the race and since then we have called ourselves team VICTORY.

Running became a healing process for us.  We joined the NY Road Runners Club in 2010.  Nine qualifying races later including volunteer work we aimed high and ended up qualifying for the NYC Marathon for 2011.  My biggest pride and joy aside from crossing all 9 finish lines was sharing the experience with Michael and the boys.  Mike got motivated himself and ran the Father’s day race, my other best friend Vanessa ran the Self Magazine 4 mile race with us and Nathan participated in all the kid races. Nate the Great!

I always felt I was one with the road with my comfortable & durable Asics Kenyan. 

Long distance running became a challenge for me since I have a small bladder.  Pit stops at MC D’s and Starbucks and the occasional “Pop a Squat” all became part of my running routine.   I’ve come to find out that many professional runners use Adult Diapers, a guarantee run without stops.  Hell to the No will I ever submit to that!!

Running is self-gratifying. Everything that goes into the training: the hard work, the regime, the laundry, the sweat, the pounds lost are only recognized with a big banner at the end of the race that says FINISH. 

In October 2010, two years after my surgery I completed the Diva Half Marathon in Long Island NY.  This race is the ultimate experience and gratification other than receiving a bagel and a banana after crossing the finish line.    I’m talking about Dj’s, Firefighters, tutus, feather boas, tiaras, champagne toast and a Blinged out Metal.  Super Experience!! 

Running is beyond therapy.  It’s the source that nourishes my soul and physical appetite. I’ve stopped running for about six months now.   I decided to slow down my pace and shift my energy at the moment to my new home and life in CT.  I will return to running one day but in the meantime this blog and zumba workouts are my replacement outlets.

Check It!! I turned my Diva Outfit into an 80’s Costume for Halloween. 

15. Delete Button

The secret to life is friendship.  The relationships I have with my best friends are sacred and sincere.  People have come and go and I love & appreciate those that have never left my side.

In my dreams, I am starring down a big Whirlpool.  One by one, I see people in my life now being extinguished down the pipes.  Once all the water is drained and everyone is gone I feel an inner tranquility.  Give and Take, Come and Go, Use and Abuse, Not Here Not There—sadly we see these relationships every day in our lives including friendships.  In my reality, there are people who are weak that are holding me back from strengthening my inner backbone.  It’s become a true challenge to figure out who in my life wants me to succeed, overcome, and take the SPOTLIGHT here and there.  I’ve currently experienced hardship and disappointments with relationships.  The saying “Misery Luvs Company” never gets old.

I have allowed TOXIC people in my life justifying the relationship with the memories and history we have built together. I’ve been resistant to admit that the past is not strong enough to hold on to the future anymore.    

I had a complex in which I wanted to be liked by everyone and disliked by no-one.  Therefore my standards were low and I allowed too many unnecessary faces in my life.  I downplayed myself by acting very naïve, somewhat innocent and now I feel like my character is misinterpreted.  Today I will boldly say “Not anymore!”  Present and aware.  Savvy and Intuitive, I am here.

Now that I have kids I realize that I can't have low standards with who I allow in my life.  Understanding the true meaning of friendships I realize these faces have to go because aside from the past we share no common grounds.  

Face book is a culprit.  Example, I receive a friend request.  How do I know you? HS, College, friend of a friend etc.  Do you really care about me or do you just care to add a number to your friend list.  “Who you know vs. who knows you” makes a big difference to keep in mind. 

I’ll be doing a little spring cleaning these next few days.

Moving forward with the DELETE button in all aspects of my life.  I will live happily ever after, not alone but with my right faces.

"Truly great friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget"(g.r) 

14. Whipped

In Honor of Cinco de Mayo!!

Hostess with the Mostess!  Carnival Fever is in my blood. I’m in the scene and love a good time. Before my daytime career as a mom and an accountant (sigh), I was a Mad Scientist behind concoctions of Happy Juice (alcoholic beverages). 

  Bartending through my college years may seem Glamorous for some but Hands Down the hardest job I’ve taken upon. Bar tending is fun but don’t underestimate the work and skill behind it: 12 hour shifts, on your feet the whole night, harassment no longer becomes a compliment, no breaks other than to use the restroom, you can stuff down some food in between breaks but then the risk of getting bloated and not looking sexy in that belly shirt (So not worth it!), your shoes and hands get super sticky from all the spills and you are most likely sleep deprived and deaf by the end of the night. 
I considered myself the best bartender since I was overly generous with my counts in pouring.  But for those guys that crossed me the wrong way I was extra generous with my spit in their drinks. Word!

I’ve been enjoying the art of entertaining since I’ve moved to my new home.  I love to find and try new drinks to serve at my get togethers.  My all time favorite drinks no matter the occasion are Café Patron (chilled) and Coconut Ciroc. 

Recently, my mom introduced me to my New Ultimate Pick of the Month:

PINNACLE VODKA WHIPPED.  Taste just like Whipped Cream.  Take it as a shot or mix it in with Cranberry Juice or Tonic.  YUM-O!  The vodka brand has other flavors such as Cotton Candy and Butterscotch.  Let me know if you have tried and have any favorite flavors from this brand...??

Next Month I plan to Wind it Down with a brand of wine called Mommy’s Time Out.  A well deserved break I say.

13.Blood Thicker Than Water

Dear Officer:

I’d like to press charges.  I’m the victim.  ABANDONED when I was a little girl.  EXPOSED to a life of Money Laundering and Drug Trafficking.  EXPLOITED by the FBI.  They have snapped hundreds of pictures of me and I am now part of a file that sits on their desk and is revisited every couple of years.  (Explains why I love posing for the camera).  ALIENATED as the girl that grew up in a single parent home.  EXCLUDED from those special father/daughter events such as graduation, wedding and birth of my children.  DISTRAUGHT from my emotions and WOUNDED with deep seated scars aimed at the heart.  DAMAGED, DECEIVED, DEPRIVED, FORGOTTEN. 

Dear Daddy:   

Look at me now!  I’ve made it this far without you!  Your sweet little girl has gone sour.  I remember the Racist remarks you had against my husband.  I remember the day you slapped my face and called me a Bitch.  I remember your preference of choosing my brother and kicking me to the side.  Growing up Father-less has infused my self destructive habits, has had an effect on my poor love relationships, inability to trust, and changed my emotional perspective.  I do have compassion and understand you faced many challenges in your life.  I thank you for crossing paths with my mom and blessing her with your seed.  Those little swimmers make some pretty awesome kids.  I have children now of my own and I am cutting out the pattern I grew up with. " The Heart That Truly Loves Never Forgets".

Dear Officer:  

 I have CONARTIST genes but I’d be only fooling myself if I keep blaming my childhood for my actions today.  I stand here today in front of the jury to testify of my new Will, Power and Self Control.  I am the decision maker of my actions, not my past.  I do have daddy issues but  Forgiveness is over rated.  There are people in your life today that deserve more respect and love from you than people who are entitled to Forgiveness because blood is thicker than water.  I’m dropping the charges.  I’m all grown up and I choose to let go.  

12. Hot Topic

My Dearest Friend Kanwal and one of the most Motivating Brilliant people I know has an Amazing Blog to Check Out!! We have done the workout Insanity together, the BPC Cleanse, and recently the Cinch Life-Style. 

She is my go to girl for Recipes, Tips and Ideas in the Kitchen.  She makes cooking fun, fast and super easy. 

Check her blog out!

 http://www.kanwalskitchen.blogspot.com/

11. Thin Line

Dancing is self expression without words.  A release of energy that makes me feel untouchable! Unstoppable!  Music & Dancing is a Universal Language and has become my outlet this year.  I took on running last year but lately Zumba has fulfilled my physical appetite.   I’ve been attending Zumba class twice a week.  My schedule permits an hour to work out three to four times a week.  Therefore, that hour needs to be intense, challenging, fun and calorie efficient.  Two weeks ago, I had the worse substitute in Zumba class.  Boy, was I not only pissed with the waste of a work out but I felt a Spark. Inspiration came knocking at my feet.

Not all shoes are created equal.  Please don’t go to Zumba with your running sneakers. It’s just not cute or beneficial to the dance technique.  I wore my running shoes for the first three classes and I felt Frumpy and slow on my moves.  I’m a HUGE FAN of Asics so I purchased the Asics Corrido.  Super light, very comfortable, roomy for my Wide Feet, and super sleek and sexy.  It made a big difference on my performance level.  It just did!

It’s an epic time in my life and I am playing with the idea of becoming Fairfield’s best Zumba Instructor.  Ok, “ni pa tanto” but I have the desire to teach Zumba.  Bottom line, I want to give someone else that sparkle.  I want to explore my body’s capacity and endurance to learn a new language and be able to translate it to the world.  I had a random girl come up to me at the end of class and said, “You really kept me going today.  You’re amazing and I enjoyed watching you over the substitute teacher”.  My reaction--smile from ear to ear.  You are about to witness my thought process to determine if I should obtain the Zumba certification.  It’s significant to convince both myself and Michael.  Participating in a new hobby or possibly the beginning of a new career would take time and money away from the family and I really have to weigh my decisions.  Teaching this class is not a lucrative job ($15-20p/h); it would be to simply fulfill a desire and to check off another great accomplishment in my lifetime.  Is this all worth the tradeoff? 

“The strongest among the weak is the one who doesn't forget her weaknesses”.  Here goes and notice how I have one of the most contradicting personalities: 1. Improving Self Image is a given.  2. I am sincerely shy but very social.  3. I can make friends easily but I’m not outspoken.  4. I am very opinionated but I never enter a debate, to each his own, has been my attitude.  5.  I work hard but I always do a Half Ass Job.   6. Last but not least, I absolutely cannot manage anyone and cannot tell people what to do.  Not in my nature.  So I am thinking... Zumba will work and reinforce all of my weakness.  I will feel empowered and driven by the energy. Mind, body, soul will be stronger.  Lastly, I will witness how influential I really can become and that lil me can make a Big difference.

Seen by my eyes, taken with my Cam

I’ve convinced myself already but the only one stopping me here is Michael.  WHAT! a non supporting husband?  Not on the same page? not encouraging my dream? He has pointed out that it would relatively take almost four months for me to make up the upfront costs.  I would need to figure out childcare to work part time in addition to my full time job and it would definitely take time away from the family.  I understand him and also recognize he has not pursued many dreams as well in the name of our family.  I will compromise to hold off till the end of summer to re-evaluate where we are at the time.  But once again, this decision will be a thin line between my personal advantage, my passion, self love and my responsibilities as a Mother.  Always a trade-off when you’re a mom.  An internal struggle of your full potential vs. responsibilities aka sacrifices.  For now my balance will be to enjoy Zumba as a student and prepare to be engaged and completely committed to my new calling, one day…..

10. Savvy Diva

Just a Few of the every day items I shop for and save on every time!!

Summer is almost here!!  Gas Prices are going up and we want to spend more time at the beach rather than on long annoying lines at the store. I am a huge FAN of online shopping.  Especially when I save around 15 to 30% on most household items.  Simple Tip! Amazon Subscribe and Save.

The word SAVE is Fantabulous (my combination of Fantastic and Fabulous).  But I was quickly to dismiss this amazing deal on amazon because the word SUBSCRIBE to me means a long term commitment and Michael has already claimed that aspect in my life.

To my surprise this amazon feature has no obligation other than you feeling happy because you saved a whole lot of money and NO SHIPPING CHARGES!

The Simple Run Down:

1. Select an item eligible for S&S from Amazon.
2. Choose your delivery schedule: One, Two, Three or Six Months
3. Sign Up, Pay for your Item
4. And if for whatever reason you only want to order this product as a ONE TIME DEAL, then simply  cancel the subscription as soon as it ships to you.

YOU WILL SAVE INSTANTLY EVERY TIME!!

Check It: Amazon FAQ

Happy Savings!!

9. Turning Back the Wheel of Time

I recently was asked an Incredible Moment Defining Question.  I had my Best Friends over the house and we were playing a game where each person writes down general questions you want your friends to answer and you toss them in a bowl.  I’ve know my best friends for 14 years and I learned that night that the best part of a friendship just like in any relationship is that no matter how many years go by you can still be surprised in Amazing ways.

My turn, few Mojitos in, my question:  If I can go back in time would I have married my other half and at such a young age? Wow! Take it in, Breathe, Here goes it gets deep.

The question itself couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m facing the biggest contradiction there is right now in my life -- how does a Parent attempt to re-invent themselves? I’m reflecting on all the things I want to do with my time but held back by the choices I made earlier in life.  Let’s throw the word Selfish out the window since becoming a parent is the most selfless act there is in the world.  So I’m thinking of the question and my mind starts to remind me of the opportunities I want to pursue:  a career in fitness/nutrition, travel abroad, learn 5 languages, become a Zumba Instructor, take singing lessons (I’m tone deaf), party in Ibiza, live out at sea, countless cause the show in my mind always goes on…..  One of my weaknesses is my lack of patience.  Technically speaking I can accomplish all these things but I just need to wait a few years.   “Waiting is a trap. There will always be reasons to wait. The truth is, there are only two things in life, reasons and results, and reasons simply don't count.” (R.Anthony)   

I met Mike, aka my Soul Mate, at a defining moment in my life, being raised in a single parent home and I was lacking a Male figure in my life.  I was 13 and I fell in love for the first time and last time.  He was my prince charming that came to my rescue and saved me from facing the awkward stage of adolescence and the cruel reality of my life during that time.  I lived and breathed Michael.  My world revolved around US.  Our first Spring Break came around in college and I invited him to travel along with me on a girl’s trip.  Throw up in your mouth yet? Lol Ok, for one I would definitely go back in time and change that part, lol.  We did grow apart for a bit but we always found our way back to each other.  Not to mention all the beautiful things that came from our togetherness. 

 

On a side note that would be my TOP relationship advice to all couples: always grow together. Be on the Same Beat. 

So I answered my best friends:  “If I had the opportunity to go back in time I wouldn’t have married Michael back then.  GASP!  I would have married him now.  How awesome would it be if I could live a parallel life like in a FRINGE episode?  Turning back the Wheel of Time doesn’t change the fact that Mike and I are meant for each other and hopefully through this outlet I will learn the virtue of patience.  Instead of focusing on the list of things to accomplish back when I was single I need to create new challenges and opportunities that reflect who I am as a person today.  I am a mom, a wife, a daughter, a friend, a sister and I will continue to be a whole lot of things.  I will walk along the foot prints of my boys...

8. The Goodies

This blog will be quick, fast and painless but that’s not how you describe a visit to the Dentist.  I get a regular routine every six months, never had a filling in my life.   Just my luck, I move out of town, change my dentist and Tada! I get not one but 4 cavities.   I am traumatized and have found some great alternatives for a fun Easter Egg Hunt without the sweets. 

It was a creative task to figure out small enough egg fillers that were healthy, fun and not a choking hazard.  Happy Easter! Hope these small tips inspire you and help you fill up those eggs with the Goodies.

Fun:  Stickers, Bouncy Balls, Money, Coins, Tattoos, Mini action figures, Lego Pieces, Play Dough, Chalk, Silly Bands, Erasers, Rings, Balloons

Healthy: Cheerios, Trail-Mix, Raisins/Cranberries, Marshmallows, Gold Fish, Popcorn, Vitamin Gummy Bears, Animal Crackers, Pretzels

Speaking of gold fish, pass up on winning them at carnivals!  It will avoid you having to explain to your kid why it died the next day…